Tuesday, November 10, 2009

ups and downs

A lot has gone on bloggie friends since my last post. I will try to update you loyal and devoted readers over the next few days. Let's just say its involved tests, family feuds, interviews and 911 calls. yes. yikes. you betcha. stay tuned dude.

First, I will address something dear to my heart and my duodenum. I am not a doctor, remember that folks. But I'm probably better apt than your average bear to understand why I need to maintain a gluten free diet. I am compelled to post this because my mom recently wrote a truly heartfelt testimonial on what it's like to be a gluten free mom. I'm pretty self sufficient (shhhh. snickers in the peanut gallery), but I do still rely on being able to travel home to a comfortable, loving and GF environment. Her dedication to making my childhood home safe for me is beyond tangible value.

So whats the scoop? We've got the beginnings of a family feud going on. You know. families. They crumble over the important things. Sex, land, green bean casserole. I write this not be be overtly flippant about the scenario. My mom is the only human being I know that feels every emotion I feel. She doesn't let me wallow in the emotions, let me tell you, but I know she feels them. And I think we got our feelings hurt. Being gluten free makes you feel very alone at times. This is augmented by the fact that in America all holidays revolve around stuffing your face to the point of compete absurdity. Nothing like he holiday season to bring out the loving hearts of those that surround us. GAAAAA. I need my food. SO FREAKING OVERLY IMPORTANT. relax chilluns. goodness.

I waited a bit to make this post. I was mad at first. Hurt and angry. I've simmered. I think I've reached a new understanding of the dynamics of this particular situation. And you know what. Blogging about it helps me finalize my thoughts. So there. I'm more forward than meine mutter. But whatevs. I'd say it out loud.

I've decided my family just simply doesn't understand what Celiac disease is. I won't get over it. It's not a choice. And no, I can't have just smidgen of gluten. And no, that's not unreasonable. Do you know what an immune system is? I'm not being facetious. I'm honestly asking. Celiac disease is NOT an allergy. It is NOT a sensitivity. It is most like an autoimmune disease. My intestines are leaky, and gluten gets through. I was born that way brotha. jeeze. When my immune system sees gluten, it FREAKS out. It starts attacking my body. When I see gluten, my body decides to mow down my intestines. Yes. Even a microscopic amount of gluten is found by my every hunting immune system. As misguided as it may be, it launches into gear with a vengeance. When that pathway is activated my intestine goes from plush cushy yarny carpet to seriously disgusting burbur in a 70s lunchroom of your local middle school. I have no ability to absorb nutrients. My intestines do not function. I lose weight. I am malnourished. I break my hip. I may even get lymphoma. Listen people. Cancer and broken hips are not worth eating something risky. It's just not.

Yes. I can be picky. If you don't like it, that's fine. I believe you love me, you just really don't understand. It only takes a microscopic amount. Lets re-frame. If I offered to spray you in the face with only "a little bit" of smallpox, would you let me? Would you let me sprinkle a wee bit of H1N1 on your eggs for breakfast tomorrow? Do you want just a tiny bit of polio? Nope, probably not. why? you immune system knows. It finds it, and you will die. right? smallpox is no joke folks. Anyways. Sigh I'm done. My mom has gone to no end to make the kitchen safe for me. I love her more than I can express. And I'm safe to eat there. God is good :)

As much as people don't really get it, I must say I've been blessed to have some insanely awesome and understanding people in my life. For example. I made a new friend ( I know, I know). My teammate on peds invited me over for pumpkin carving before Halloween. He found out I was gluten free, among many other fun facts. We spent countless hours waiting for children to come through he ED at 2 am here.

Hotel Henne!

Glamorous. Anyways.

Pumpkin carving was a blast. When I arrived I was astonished to find my ped's partner and his wife had purchased skittles and strongbow cider for my refreshment pleasure! His wife even sent me home with family recipes for caramels and almond flour cookies-naturally gluten free. How gracious!

Next, in the land of amazing humans... My good friend Dan, grower of gardens and tamer of bees finagled this fantastic deal. Apparently at a gathering of his a woman brought in gluten free bread. Ever the curious creature of course he samples. Turns out her recipe was spot on. He proceeded to tell her all about me and asked for the recipe. Wouldn't you know at the next meeting she shows up with the recipe AND a gluten free bread machine and flour mixes for MOI! Are you kidding!?!?! I guess she is moving and also has a heart the size of Texas. Gotta love the kindness of strangers.

Jon made his apt gluten free for me as well. He bought a set of pans/utensils/plates and cutlery for me and stores them in a separate drawer. He's got the H1N1 in this pic. Do you want just a smidge sprayed in your face? no? ok loves. I'll let you be :)


Lisa from Lisa's Yarns said...

Great post, Suzanne. :) That is awesome about the bread maker/mixes!! I expect some posts in the future (when you actually have time!)

Hope the interviews went well. I am sure they did, though. You are so smart & talented!

Hope Jon is back to full health!

B and B said...

1. I am glad you took the opportunity to explain. You are much better about it than I.
2. Being a visual person, I am going to be carrying the image of the middle school cafeteria carpet in my head. Yuck.
3. I hadn't heard about the kindness of your friend from peds. What a wonderful gesture to help you feel welcome!
4. I saw the bread machine from Dan when we were at your apt. to deliver luggage. Hopefully, you will have time soon to experiment with making bread. It would be fun and make your apartment smell great, too!
5. Poor Jon. Does he know he is pictured during his illness? Glad he is better.
6. I have found a gf recipe for green bean casserole. It will appear on this year's Thanksgiving menu, even making gluten free onion bits. I'll never understand the cravings for that recipe or those grossly overly sweetened sweet potatoes, either.
7. Can't wait to read your report on the 911 call last night!

Abby and Ryan said...

I love your description of Gluten-sensitivity. It actually made me feel as though I am in your intestines watching all hell break lose with your immune system. Great post :)

qwerkyqook said...

Thanks for the comments guys. Lisa, if you've seen my mom's most recent blog i think i'll have to get breadmaking. She demanded a vessel for apple butter eatage! Abby, thanks, but i'm truly sorry to make anyone feel like they are in my intestines! yikes. Unless youre on a magic schoolbus... Did you read ms Frizzle books growing up? Mom. no jon doesnt know he's pictured. I'm allowed. I made the blueberry cake he's eating. He doesnt read the blog anyways. what he doesnt know wont hurt him :)

Marlys said...

Well said & I know you feel better now that you've put it in so many words! loved the blog!

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